Hello, everybody, and welcome to a brand new series on heritage radio network called the culinary call sheet where we give a peek into the back kitchen of culinary media. I'm your host, April Jones,

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Hello, and welcome to your host of cooking issues coming to you. From Lower East Side of Manhattan, we got Anastasia the hammer Lopez coming from a newly renovated power and internet cord which is currently draped across our lawn being pooped on by geese in Stamford, Connecticut. I actually we have Matt in I guess his Brooklyn broom booth. Correct. But Rhode Island row have they changed the name yet? Have you lost the Providence Plantation yet? Are you still got the long name?

I don't think that was an official thing. I was like, you know, we live in the era of unilateral executive decisions. So that was a rimando joint. It's not the real like legal name of the state.

Okay, and finally, I don't know where you are. John, where are you now? Are you you're not in Murray Hill now. Right?

Oh, I'm in Alpine New Jersey.

Oh, Alpine New Jersey. Not really aptly named.

No, no, not at all.

You look out your window. In Alpine New Jersey, you're going to see like other houses like some trees. I mean, it's it's ritzy. It's nice, but like you know, like you're not going to see the yodeler from the prices right? Which by the way, I can never for some reason I can never mentally you ever have songs in your head that you love them but you can't mentally gel the tune like you can't whistle it you can't sing it but when you hear it you're like oh my god. Yes. The Price Is Right yodeler is one of those things for me.

The Price Is Right yodeler you don't know the

yodeler

what we built him in the lab member at the FCI and he like climbed to the temperature of CV cooking

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like we were trying to teach people like different temperatures and not going over and under so we got the prices we did the Stasi I think printed out we cut out the prices right yodeler and that the theory of The Price Is Right yo Adler first of all for those you who clearly like you guys grew up like like in a sewage great with the with the Ninja Turtles. The Price Is Right is a television show wherein you try to guess the price of something. All right. For many years that was hosted by Bob Barker, you might only remember him from that Adam Sandler movie where he beats the crap out of out Adam Sandler on the golf course. But he actually was a host of the prices right? And they had blue games that they would play where people get prices and the Stasi and I like one of our favorites is this yodeler and what happens is is that you you get a price and if you're like is off by like, you know $20 It has to it climbs up the mountain and yodels as it does by 20 units. It he I can't remember what he actually does, though I can't ever remember his actual yodeling tune. And then if you if you're wrong if you go too far, then he falls off the mountain and dies and you don't win, you know, your washer dryer combo, which is I guess what you're playing for is your washer and dryer combo is a great show. Oh, yeah. Oh, hell yeah. Have you ever seen the documentary on the prices? Right? All right. All right. It's book, maybe not for you worth watching. But for me, definitely worth watching. So there was this guy, I forget his name. And there's a couple of people who have done it. Where what he did was he watched the prices, right? Like, he didn't have a job. He just watched the prices, right. And he kept track of everything they ever did on prices, right? He kept like a database of all the stuff that they had ever done on prices, right? And so he kind of, they would always kind of go back to the well and dip back in and always like, choose something that maybe a little bit different. What would the same, like suggested retail price. And so he just knew what they were going to ask. And he would stand out in the line every day trying to get picked, and then go into the audience every day trying to get picked, and it took years for him for him for you know, for comun because that's what they say, come on down. You're the next contestant on my prices, right? And you come down and you have to guess right but he'd never been called. So he showed up and he was there every day trying to everyday he could be in California cuz I don't think he lived in California, he would go and try to get on and he finally got on. And he gets everything like on the nose, like on the nose such that people were like, What the what? What the hell? You know what I mean? And I think like he almost got banned at one point it was it's interesting for those who like the prices, right? But anyway, prices right? yodeler is a song that I can't keep in my head. And when you're in Alpine, New Jersey, you might look out and think you're going to see beautiful Alpine mountains, but you won't. In fact, the closest thing that to a mountain you have is a cliff you can fall off but you can't see it from the New Jersey side. If you want to see the cliff. You have to go to the New York side and look across the river and it's called the Palisades. Are you with me on this, John?

Yes, you're very right so far.

Although Palisades Park you've ever taken a walk up to Palisades Park? No, I haven't. Very nice. So like that. Very nice. So like we have this weird it's actually an interesting geological feature. not impressive. For those of you that live I live in the mountains. I live and live in the Rockies but but like for those of us that live in the relatively flat east coast, like the Hudson River, like was here already and the Palisades kind of rose up next to it. And so there's this cliff face that's cut through where the Hudson River comes through. And there's a park where you can walk along the cliff edge, which is a little bit gives me a little bit of Agito but they have like handrails and you can walk unfortunately there's also like a car Parkway right there but it's still a nice walk. You should check it out.

John, what are you what are you doing out there? And what are you cooking?

So I am up here cooking for some of us Open tennis players specifically know that joke image as he's gearing up for the US Open. Helping a longtime friend of mine cook. He's the one who has worked with the family before and done this thing. This is a third year running now for the US Open. And yeah, it's pretty different than what I am used to. It's vegan gluten free cooking. The last time I cooked from actually two years ago he was at least still doing fish but no more apparently.

Why do you think he does that?

I have no idea. I'm trying to find out more about his dietary habits. And so actually, Dad, we were just talking about this before you joined what purpose would boiling nuts three times and then dehydrating them do?

Which nuts Did you boil? Any? No, no, come on, dude. These nuts. They were like

yeah, no. Think of it.

Anyway, who knows? Man who knows? Who knows? Like someone's worried about some what

he like this guy. He's in that movie that I told you about the game changers where they were all these athletes and these these people that like want to be at the top of their game and who that guy that ran the Appalachian Trail or whatever. They all have the same diet. And they believe that it makes them stronger and better and quicker like at thinking

and Aristotle believed that if a woman exerted herself and did too much exercise that she might sprout Penis people can be wrong. Even smart people can be just wrong about things. You know what I mean? So it's like,

like, Yes, I agree with you there but then at the same time to also be with what Anastasia is saying, like, you know, these people I'm looking at this documentary now the game changers like Lewis Hamilton Novak Djokovic, Jackie Chan, like, these are all people at the top of their game.

Is this guy. Good. By the way, this joke of rich guys a good I don't know anything about tennis,

one of the best in our in our time right now.

So listen, we like something that I who I've heard of, because of Nastasia Tom Brady, right? Yeah, now

we're gonna just go to the tomato thing again, like this, the only thing you sight with him? And like you need to get about this like, Okay, what I'm seeing is this data out and think about all the other stuff that he does that the same diet that that drug is doing. It's just like, maybe he doesn't like tomatoes. Maybe someone gave him bad information, that line. But that's the whole point. That's what I'm saying. But you're just basing the entire like this entire thing that John just said and named off all these people and you're like, but the tomatoes like,

well, I don't know anything about their diets. So I'm going to the one that we've discussed, because I have some knowledge of what the person has said. And I don't know why you're getting, I don't really understand why you're getting so bent. There must be a reason. But okay. But my point is, if you let me finish my point, I think it's completely stupid. And so here's what I think. Do I think that Tom Brady because I don't know this other guy from a hot rock because the world's greatest tennis player could knock on my door and hand me a package and I'd say thanks and shut the door in his face, because I have no idea who he is. Right? So it's like, the other good Tom Brady thing is he was in that show with, with with? Who's it? Rudd? Do you see that show? No, no, no, the premise of it is that, that you go to a spa, and they they actually murder you and clone you living with yourself. Yeah, living with yourself that I'm not giving a lot away, they murder you and they clone you, right. And so and the idea is is that your telomeres and everything you get like a baby's telomeres and all this other stuff. So you're like a fresh copy of yourself that hasn't been beat down. Like you have all your memories and everything. But you're a brand new fresh physical copy of your current age, self best self right. And so one of the jokes and he played into it, which made me kind of like them a little more is Brady is in it as like, that's how he stayed kind of current by having himself like murdered and rebuilt like nine times like I come here like a week. Yeah, anyway, classic. So I'm gonna go ahead and say maybe it said he's rich. Well, first of all, like, genetically predisposed to being a good athlete. Trains, like a mother has talent in the sport that they want to do, and just is rich enough to do whatever they need to do to train and like, works at it constantly, because that's their job. I'm going to say that probably that's the important part of it. And having a crazy diet helps them focus on their body being the most important thing in their life. But it's not the actual diet that's doing it. It's just the crazy amount of focus work and money they're spending on it, plus a lot of talent and like you know, good luck to have the genes to do that. I'm gonna go ahead and say it's that

I think it's a little more than that. I think right? Like I don't know when you eat like burgers over the course of Oh, yeah, sorry. Sorry. Today

Dave, so like elephants and rhinos and hoard like all the the herbivore like, if you don't eat meat, then you should be a weak thing.

Okay, listen, because you can't build muscle. These are huge and plodding. Right. Like apex predators are what? carnivores? Whoa, dang did that self but that's because you can't have a carnivore. I don't believe what I'm saying. I'm just saying that Nastasia is logic is bad, because I can easily present logic on the other side that says exactly the opposite. I think it's all horse hockey.

John, go tell him that go tell him that and then you know, don't don't make that money here.

Yeah, yeah. Stars,

John, John, he needs

to go make he needs to be going said not to make the money please.

Just just secret some meat in there and then tell him after he wins that with the meat and I only boiled your nuts twice.

Never do that. Listen, if someone came up to me and said, Listen, I only want you to, uh, you can only use Froot Loops. That's the only ingredient I'll be like, Alright, let's see what I can do with Froot Loops. I mean, I don't care if I'm not eating it. You know what I mean? I don't have any like issue with what Someone else's diet is, in less cocaine. Give you an example. Here's why I'm pissed about the Brady thing. My mom and my stepfather believe it. And so now I have to deal with them changing their diet for something that's completely dumb. And they don't even have the support that Brady has, or these other people have to do all these things, and they believe it. You know, it's like, it's, it's like, people make these decisions. If you make the decision, and you genuinely like having, like, a crazy diet, and it actually like makes you feel more authentically whole as a person, then do it. You know what I mean? If you like the taste of, you know, not eating anything but triple boil Deez Nuts, then you know what? Eat boiled?

I'm sure John is making, like, using vegetables and stuff and like, that's okay. And I really think that you could do without meat. I can do without me. Anybody could do without meat. Did I say you could not know but, but it sounds like you're saying that if you choose to not eat meat. That's crazy.

Okay, I'm specifically not saying that. Okay. I'm not saying that.

It doesn't

die. Crazy. What I'm saying is this is crazy you like and also like to say the argument that you hear were all these high performance people who are part of a dietary cult, right? That is my issue with it. These people are high performing people in a dietary cult, non high performing people look at them and think if I do this dietary cult, maybe I will be a tennis star, you won't know I don't

think it's that Dave, I think that what they're saying is yes, we are like super human species. And you know, what puts me over the edge that 5% Not having this diet and not eating the meat that weighs me down. That's what they're saying. Of course, these people are like, incredible at what they do. But they they they did it one way and they did it another way. And they're like I am 5% better if I cut out this thing and that 5% matters. Okay? I'm just going to agree on this. Because all mental,

it's not all mental. It's they make a certain decision to take like to go crazy in terms of training. And if part of that it's over determined, none of these are controlled experiments. This is all this is all craziness. It's a cult. It's like when someone's like joy, listen to raw food, right? If you want to eat raw food, go ahead and eat raw food, right? If you read raw food cookbooks, some of them written by people that I like to hang out with even some like, what I'm not going to name any names, right? They all talk about the glow that this does that cult like language. Do you remember when we had Wrangham on the show? They the Harvard professor who was like, yeah, like, what makes us human is the fact that we cook food. Like literally you need to spend all day every day eating food. It's another cult diet. It's all the same. It's another cold diet.

What do you think? Like, truly, what do you think? About what about what Dave is saying?

What am I saying?

I'm asking them? What am I saying what you're saying? What? I don't know. I'm asking them. What do you think of what Dave is?

I don't remember no. What do you think I am saying?

I'm not going to decipher it for them. I'm asking them

I don't want to hear what they think about what I said until they tell me what they think I said because you're

you're saying you're not playing a lot. You're not placing a lot of importance on your, you're discounting food science. Science, Social Science, what nutritional science.

I'm not even discount No, like, I am discounting cults. I am discounting cults watch, okay? Because I haven't watched a documentary produced by someone who probably believes in the cult. Like, I don't believe in cults, if it's real great. Sounds like a cult to me.

I mean, listen, he's, you know, these people, and especially in this documentary, they're all athletes at the very top of their game again, like if practice, you know, working out money, all that definitely plays into it, but like, you can't discount I don't think you know, that diet plays a hugely important role into that. And I agree with myself say, you know, maybe 5% is a little too much, but even if it makes them a two or 3% better than the other people, you know, like in this case, and tennis and like, do it if it seems if that seems to be the thing that's working and making the change, like, I think there's something to it and to perform at the level that these people perform that again, like, you can't just be shoveling random stuff into your body. It needs to be

I would say shovel random stuff into your body. Did I say eat hot pockets, aka poo pockets.

Then what are you saying you should eat Dave to be at the top of your game?

I don't know. I'm not an expert and I don't care. I'm not a cult leader. And I'm also not like a performance athlete.

I just will do a bunch of research. Oh, it's chicken

breasts and eggs. And that's the fastest freaking good dude that lived in my lifetime. The man doesn't like broccoli, he eats it.

He eats he would be faster. Maybe he'd be faster. No, maybe not. And maybe

the faster than the fastest. What I'm seeing is is that this is this is just cold language. And 20 years ago, 30 years ago, it was a different culture. People were like, I need to eat nothing but beef, steak and protein, it and they

that whole documentary.

The culture change from week to week. Okay? This is good. No, this is good. This That was bad. Everything we knew before is bad do this, that people need to make money, they need a new coat, whatever. And so it's someone who's like gonna make it. It's also

good for the environment and not have all these cows everywhere and killing like all of the

pack on meat. It's not the only issue in this thing. Like meat is not the only

that's the only issue I'm talking about in this because you're not that's not

what we're talking about. You want it to be I'm saying something against meat and I against vegetarianism, and that's not what I'm saying. So like, you can't make me be saying that because that's not what I'm saying. Okay. I'm saying I don't like food cults. I think they are bad for the world. I think they are bad for Americans. I think they are bad for our overall health. And definitely bad for our pocketbooks. Because we spend all this money on crazy stuff. The what he is is vegan? No, he's not just vegan, you have to vote, you have to triple boil his nuts. He has a crazy to boil his nuts, and make sure that there's not all of these weird triggers in his diet. That is not normal diet. That's a coke diet.

David J Foster is in chat, and I believe this is relevant to them. So he says he says Dave, what do you think about

oat bran? Oh, my God trolling me.

Is this a cult thing? Or is this? Okay?

I don't know. Yeah, like, so it's like, there's a famous famous thing from the 80s called the oat rush, where everyone, I think that's what you're talking about where it was, there was a very bad study. I mean, it was bad study. But you know, it was like, too many conclusions were drawn from it, were as paid for by the oat people, that if you consumed X amount of oat bran, your cholesterol will go down. So like everybody, like, you know, was like, you know, jumping out of windows trying to get oat bran into their, into their, into their products. And it's called the Great oat rush. And it's it's a horse hockey, it's all garbage. It's it's all it's all filth. It's all lies, you know what I mean? It's like, is oat brand bad for you know, I'm sure that like a diet containing oat bran is can be a great diet. I like old brand. I like oats. You know what I'm saying? But to build a cult around oats. That's bananas?

Well, I do think that if you are an athlete, you have a nutritionist and a person that's constantly monitoring you and someone that's on top of this, and that and a million people that have a stake in your game. And so I imagine that whatever they're doing, or they're asking for, they're asking for it because they've done some research on this human that supplies their paychecks. So there's, I mean,

look, I think that's 100% True, right? So it's like, if you if you have enough money to have full time people, and you're doing blood labs constantly and you like know what you're like, you know, what the glucose levels in your blood are all throughout the day, and you know, all of your oxygenation levels, and you're doing all of these metrics that you know, we do maybe once a year at best, and then they can like ramp individual things that you eat up and down so that you get those numbers exactly where you want it. Yeah, that's spending money for performance. Like that's like Formula One racing stuff. Like, that's all true, right? However, it's like in cooking, right? One of the things I don't like about cooks illustrated that whole theory of how things work is they're like the best brownies, the best cookies as though there is one best way. The best way to have the optimum nutrition, in terms of just using your body as a machine is to have paid people sit around and do lab work on you constantly and tweak you up and down. But no one is saying that that's what we should do. Instead, they're convincing my poor parents to eat crazy cold food. You see the difference?

cold food, they're just saying that you're not going to be able to get that kind of care and lab work that these people are getting, but they but the people that are getting this Karin doing the lab work at this level, the overarching theme is PLANT BASE

among this group of people among this group of people.

So who's the other? Usain Bolt?

I just told you he's the first person I thought it was like, who's the best athlete in a field that I can ever think of? Usain Bolt? And what is he eggs and chicken? All day long and pasta. He's pasta, eggs, and chicken. Okay, so what I'm saying is, is that does this subgroup of athletes? Do they believe it and believing something can make you better at something, by the way, we all know that, right? So it's like, Sure, great. And, you know, I'm sure that if my parents had the money to like, have a team of doctors around the clock, like tweaking everybody blood level, and they didn't care about living their life, like real persons and just wanted to turn their bodies into machines, I don't know why, you know, 60 something and almost 70 year old person would want to do that. But okay, you know, meanwhile, I'll keep eating tomatoes and gluten. Thank you, even when I'm not having meat, and I will eat my nuts as I like them. And I will not boil them. Great.

All right, right. Through every listener.

It's a call. It's just damaging. It just really is damaging. It's also I also hate like food as food as a as a proxy for morality. I hate food as a proxy for behavior. It's like food is food. Right? If you're like, like I say, like the equivalent of a Formula One car and human.

Why don't you talk about your diet that you did many, many, many years ago?

I've done that diet a bunch of times the brunch diet. Yeah. The bloodstock about why you did that? And because I wanted to get thinner.

And what was it?

You're familiar with? Yeah, no? Okay, here's I'm gonna deal with you crap on you. I'm done with you. Talk about the diet. Why you're being a jerk.

I'm not just saying you didn't know what brunch is was joking, Dave. Everyone knows your friendships?

Apparently not. Go ahead. So brunch. And here's what I was looking for. Anastasia wouldn't even do the setup. Right? Brunch is when you combine breakfast and lunch because you want to write that's brunch with an R. But lunch is when you decide to eat only one meal a day other than dinner. So the Blanche diet is all about my what my theory about dieting is, in terms of I have two theories about dieting, one. And these are not these are not real, this is my own personal this is like my own personal cult slash religious beliefs. But the it does work right in terms of if your only goal is to lose lose weight, right? Is if you can, if you choose what you eat on a day to day basis, it's hard to stay eating kind of like a within a very, like small set of parameters. Also, if you have a lot of different things that you eat all the time, like you find it interesting, and so you tend to eat more, if you just choose one thing that you can have for your, your your your your brunch, right, and then that's all you eat all the way up to, to dinnertime, right? Then you don't crave anything anymore, really, because you know what you're going to have. So I've done like, I've done it like two three times. And the first time I did launch the brunch was an everything bagel with nothing on it. That was blush. And then that was all I had very effective. I dropped a lot a lot, a lot, a lot of weight. And then at dinner, like 60 pounds at dinner, right? You you can have, you know, you're not supposed to go crazy, but you eat with other people. So the idea is, is that during the daytime, when you're not eating with other people, you just do brunch. And then at dinnertime, you you eat whatever everyone else is eating. So you get to be social, right? And the theory there is is that your body really, you know, if you're combining all of your eating into one section, your body can't process everything as effectively as if you ate over like a long period of time, which is why people who want to have their food processed effectively spaced their meals out into lots of small meals, I don't want my body to process it. I want to poop out as much as humanly possible in that and I've said this on the show before he like in the extreme. Think about it this way. If you ate a gallon of oil, what you would do if you drank it, what you would do is go directly to the toilet and poop out a gallon of oil your body would not be able to process it anyway. That's neither here nor there. But lunch. Like in my case works. I've done the bagel brunch. The problem with the bagel blanch was I also lost an immense amount of muscle mass during that the other problem Have lunch is that you? You get real angry around dinner time, like really angry, like very angry around dinner time. Later blushes, I do the to egg lunch, the two hard boiled egg lunch. And that works you don't lose as much muscle mass. And I don't believe in it because I don't, I don't try to cut into anyone that has an axe to grind in nutritional science. But there's a lot of people now who are into intermittent fasting. So the blench diet is now called intermittent fasting by people and a lot of people do it and take special nutritional stuffs. What's it called supplements so they don't lose too much muscle mass during the lunch diet, but the blush diet works for me. I don't advocate it for other people though. But there you have it. Brunch is how you want to be assessed us. Yep. And why do you want me to talk about no reason?

I'd rather do this vegan diet that I'm doing here then do that. That sounds miserable. How do you even Of course you're cranky by dinnertime, you're not getting any nutrients.

I'm not doing it for performance. You don't get to like, like there is no actual diet wherein you eat whatever you want and you lose weight. Unless you like radically increase the your your amount of energy expenditure. No, there's not.

No, you're not. No. Yeah, I'm saying I'm saying of course I agree with you. Yeah, no, I there's not.

Yeah. So if you want to lose weight, hey, it's gonna suck. And then at least the advantage of Blanche is that at dinnertime, you can be a normal once you get the first couple of bites of food and your anger subsides, you can be a normal person. Eat whatever everyone else is eating. I'm giving up this I'm giving him that. No, I'm giving up choice. And I'm giving up like eating normal meals during the day. Boom. That's what I gave up. But I tell you what, to eggs that's real cheap. I don't have to like sit there and like boil $50 with a nuts and tested test toss the boiling water. And I'm not recommending it for anybody else. Okay, so much. But why do I even want me to talk about that stuff?

No reason.

We should instead talk about it. Prior

why would you want me to talk about it for no reason, though. What does that mean? There's got to be a reason like What's he talking about

crazy diets and I thought about that one.

I don't advocate it but it does work.

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What are we talking about?

Agent chef deep fryers Is there any major benefits

about deep fryer speaking of feed speaking of angry so Nastasia Lopez made friends know the Stasi Lopez was going to make friends with a CRO but she hated the CRO so she chased it off then felt she's making friends with some hawks. And then she's made friends with my least favorite of all birds. She made friends with some geese unbeknownst to me. Unbeknownst to me, now, the Stasi Lopez what

never visit so you wouldn't know.

I talk to you every day you How do I know about the how do I know about the hawk and the and the crow?

Because I talk to you about the geese too.

Now you didn't not until after this happened though. Dave

I told you about the geese. Remember we had that bet you're like I'm going to come back in spring right with the babies.

Alright, you know, you said why do you find keys so terrifying?

Yeah, I said they're not that bad. I walk straight through their gaggle I guess.

And I said wait till they have babies.

And I know I said they're super cute. And then you said you're gonna come back and do something to them.

I forget we're gonna do we're like anyway, the point is, is it so like when I had a place in Connecticut I had a deep an outdoor deep right wasn't an outdoor deep fryer like the Cajun fryer that we're going to talk about minute. It was an indoor commercial stainless steel fryer that I had fitted to run on propane. So it's not the kind of thing honestly that you should leave outside all the time uncovered. But what it is is a great kind of if you're going to have an outdoor event that you're going to run off a propane it's a great fryer for that and it's it's fairly easy to take any commercial gas equipment and retrofit it for propane, you just need to, you know, a different orifice and you need to change a couple of things. And so anyways, so when I moved out of Connecticut, I was like, hey, Stiles is put this there in case we ever have parties or anything we can fry and then we never did. So Anastasia is like, get the hell out. Now you said. Yeah. One way, you know, pretty much. So I was like, okay. Yeah, so I came to throw it in my Subaru. And of course, I'm there. My two dogs, Booker, Dax, and Jen, my wife. We're all there. And everyone has some sort of opinion about how to like whether this fryer should go into the, you know, Subaru. Whether or not it's okay to store it at my sister in law's house whether I have permission to store it my sister in law's house. And I'm like, I don't care about any of this. I'm putting it in a car now. Right? Was I wrong? Yeah, that fit? It fit. But like, Why did I need a whole bunch of opinions at that point? It seemed like in retrospect, it seems like I should have sat around and discussed people's feelings about how to get this thing into the back of the Subaru and where it was going to end up in life and what my long term life plans were for the fryer, but all I had in my head is Anastasia Lopez wants this thing out of her house. I'm driving past her house, which I don't usually do. I have a car I'm gonna shove it into the car. That's all I'm thinking. Was I was completely off base there. So should I have been like should we have had some sort of like a sit down? No. Right. So as the Stasi pointed out later, was I in the best mood? No. So these freaking geese are aren't nostos He has a beautiful lawn right? It's a beautiful lawn. It's like imagine having like a mowed lawn that somebody else moves for you. That is like, right on the water. It's like it goes lawn rock wall. And you could fish right from the lawn into the thing. No pesky sand. You know, I hate sand. No sand. Great Lawn right. The only problem with it is what the geese? So I don't know, Anastasia is friends with these geese. And I in retrospect now I remember I made a bet that when they have when they have Gosling's, we can go you can name it, Ryan, and we can go and chase after it and we can watch the mama. Now anyway, so I see these geese and I'm like, I hate you. Like I was I hate you so much. I hate geese, Canadian geese. Not because they're Canadian, but whatever. And so I tore after them and stuff like that, my friends. Did they come back? Are they still there? No,

they did not come back.

Let's see. What are you making up lies for? Come on. Really? Yeah, really? Well, you know what, people for any of you who have ever lived in Westchester, or have ever lived in Connecticut, apparently, you can hire me to show up on your lawn. And when I scare these geese, they stay scared because people spend like hundreds of 1000s of dollars at airports, hotels, anywhere that has a big lawn to try to keep these geese away from their place. So there won't be all the squawking and pooping and pooping and squawking and molesting people. So if I solo person have enough anger inside of me to scare away these geese for good, I'm sorry that I did that to you because you want them there. But maybe that should be our business instead of selling torch attachments and centrifuges? Yes. Because that's a marketable freakin skill. Scaring geese away. Mom. Speaking of Sears always want you to tell us the latest news on Amazon as

well. They're back in stock, right, John?

Yes. Well, back in stock and shipping out next week.

Yeah, so they're not actually backing? Yeah. You can preorder them. Yeah. Do you want to want to tell us? Why don't you say quickly? All right. But you want to tell no, no, no,

just the usual thing they don't know. They don't pay us on time, because we can't prove that we put all this aerosols on the boat.

So you might have the you might have the impression listening to this program that I'm the one who always gets angry. But nothing is more joyous than when the Stasi Lopez loses her cool on, like the ups on Amazon. You know, like, oh, like a lot of it not repeatable on a family on a family program. And so again, to reiterate, and we give the sizzles to Amazon, which we did months and months ago in at Shenzen in China, and they own them from that point, and then they habitually don't, apparently don't even ship them over here. I don't know why it's taking so long to get them into stock, but then they claim that they haven't received them in The United States and they want proof that that they ship them right, which is crazy. So Anastasia and I were like, like, called our factory in China. We're like, I want you to take a video of you and pictures of you handing the pallets and I want pictures. I want both of you smiling, holding the contract and shaking hands. And if you're not smiling, I'm not paying right. And then the Stasi then sends this to our Amazon contact. And our Amazon contact goes. We don't accept video proof of delivery. Tom baster like, Yeah, this is what we deal with people. From what

what will they accept as proof?

They want to see the bill that they signed.

They signed as proof. But they will they want actually proof that it arrived in the US. Right?

Yeah. They want to see the bill of lading the bill that that arrived at the warehouse that they signed, and I'm like, I don't know how to. I don't you work there. And then I said, Dave and I are totally have the time to get part time jobs in an Amazon warehouse. And he was like, That's not funny.

You're like, no, but we'll do it. You're like, no, but we'll do it. But look, I'll give you I've used many analogies. Maybe people in the US get this one. Get this one more. It's like, you went to the grocery store. Right? They handed you the receipt, right? And then you got home, right? And you like, you go and you're like where are the Fritos? Honey I bought Fritos. You look at the receipt, the receipt says Fritos, right? They scanned it, and you're like, maybe they didn't put it into the bag at the store. So you drive back to the store. And you're like, you didn't put the freedom in my bag. And then they look at the videotape. And The videotape clearly shows the cash register person putting the Fritos into the bag, and you taking the bag of Fritos and putting it into your cart and going out to the car. And you're like, Well, I don't know it never made it in my house. So I'm not paying for the Fritos. And that's basically what they're doing. Yeah, you know, so it's legitimate. Maybe they didn't put the Fritos in the bag. We've all had that happen. I hope you eat Fritos because Fritos are delicious. But we've all had it happen. But then when you go when you show them the videotape and the receipt and you're like, look, we clearly we scanned it, it's here. Here's the Fritos, nine times out of 10 By the way, you left a bag on the counter, which is what Amazon is doing. We hand them all the bags, we put it in the cart, they leave the bag in the cart, and they put the cart into the cart bin, and they drive away and they leave the Fritos in the cart. That's what Amazon is doing. Anyway. It's always exactly one box of cereals by the it's a unit number of boxes of cereals. Yeah. How many no box styles you remember? Seven? Got it? Like when you were at Stanford? Did you ever think like that? Someone would ask you how many units in a pallet if a little boy seven?

No. And that asshat at Amazon was like, you know, I know this is really hard for you guys, but you use your Stamford brain to get around and

that's why I named one of the invoices, fu Amazon.

So we had another incident semi food related. So like we It turns out that if you do business with Booker and DAX LLC, the, I guess parent company along with heritage radio, the cooking issues program, it's accompany a fair here. Eat like Azar eventually, you'll get a nickname. At first it will be because I don't remember who you are. Or maybe it's because you've done something great. I'm not gonna say what it is, right? Or maybe it's because you've done something crazy. Or maybe it doesn't have to be any of those. It could just be like, whatever, it just happens, right? And so then, and by the way, is a separate like in the real life when you meet Anastasia Lopez, you will get entered into her phone along with a descriptor and so right or wrong. Yeah, yeah, so like mine says Dave douche